The Life & Times of Finnegan Buckley The terribly exciting and ever expanding world of me, myself

Big wheelin' it!

As Saturday’s go, this one was right up there with some of the best.  First Mom & Dad took me to Target, where I got to play in the toy aisle for a while.  I suspect that they were really scoping out toys for my upcoming birthday, but I pretended not to notice.  I tried on a few really cool batting helmets…tested out some awesome cups that campers use, which twist up and down (So Cool!)…and emptied out the bin full of balls a few times.  And of course I visited with my beloved dump truck.  My favorite thing is getting a running start and then letting it go, and watching it race out into the aisle.  I love seeing how many shoppers I can trip and/or scare the crap out of.

From there we went over to REI to get mom a new tire for her bike.  When we were on a ride last week we ended up with a flat and mom had to push the bike all the way back home with me on the back.  Didn’t bother me one bit but mom looked a little sweaty by the time we got home.  Well….on the bright side…at least she still got a workout.

From there it was back home for lunch.  My most favorite – PB&J!  And for a special treat today, some chocolate toffee pistachios that someone had sent my dad in the mail.  Soooo good!  Not as good as mom’s brownies, but good nonetheless.

After that me and dad took a little nap.  Dad likes to pretend that he’s just helping me to sleep longer but we all know the truth…dad just likes to nap with me.  I’m the perfect excuse for him to take a nap on a Saturday afternoon.  Otherwise mom would have him building an addition on the house or something.

So after our nap is where the day really starts to get good.  We went to pickup up a kiddie pool from a neighbor.  It was a big green turtle and it had a cover so that the gross bugs don’t land in it.  When we got it home mom scrubbed it out real good and then dad filled it up with water right away.  The anticipation was so overwhelming that I just had to dive right in.  No waiting for it to fill  up.  Splash!  Wow, diapers really hold a lot of water.

Then Auntie Caitlin showed up for dinner.  We played in the driveway for a little while and did some coloring with chalk.  I tried to let my inner artiste’ come out and color all over Auntie Cait but she wasn’t having any of it.  Hmph.

After dinner we decided to go to the Real pool.  Woopee!  The pool is my favorite.  Especially now that I can say ‘pool.’  Now I can demand it whenever the mood hits me.  So off we went in the red wagon, loaded up with pool toys.  When we got there I had the whole pool to myself since it was so late in the day.  Double woopee!  We splashed around for about an hour.  Or, correction, I splashed around for about an hour.  Mom, Dad and Auntie Caitlin all watched from the sidelines in their pool chairs.  It was still a blast though.

About halfway through the lifeguard came in and tested the water with some scientific looking little tubes.  Mom and Dad were joking with him about how the water is probably worse in the far corner of the big pool, where all the drinkers hang out, than it is in the kiddie pool.  And I have to agree on that one.

So now it’s time to pack up and go home.  Booooo.  Booooo.

But we get all our stuff in the wagon and Dad comes over to haul me out, and he sees something suspicious floating in the pool.  Duh duh duh duh!!!  Help!  Get me out!  Somebody save me!  Everyone, run for your lives!  The way they were looking around I knew it had to be something really really terrible.  Aahhh!

Mom and Dad and Auntie Caitlin then do some whispering among themselves…what to do…what to do….

Mom finally walks over to the lifeguard who, by now, is sitting pleasantly in his lifeguard chair.  She exchanges some words with him, something to the effect of “you may need to test the water in the kiddie pool again.”  And then I hear the lifeguard say “Uh oh, you mean Code Brown?!”  She nods and then skulks away.  As she walks by me she mumbles something about being too embarrased to ever go to the pool again.

Oh god, no!  Say it isn’t so!  Not sure what that is, but it sounds REALLY bad.

But off we go, back home.  Apparently no one’s been harmed so we’re free to go on our merry way.

We get home, mom doesn’t even wait until we’re in the house, she strips me naked in the driveway and starts rinsing me off.  Hmmm…very strange.  Not sure what to make of it.  But I let her finish up.  She’s gotta do what she’s gotta do, right?  So when she’s all done and she goes over and dumps everything in the trash can.  I take that opportunity to relieve myself on the driveway….I’m feeling artistic again so I try to right my name.  I think I got it too!

I hear mom yelp, which of course, shuts off the flow immediately.  Sigh….mom, you just don’t understand boys.  But apparently Auntie Caitlin does.  I heard her tell Mom and Dad on the walk home that apparently it’s really comfortable to ‘Code Brown’ in a pool.

Still trying to figure out how she would know that….

Pre-Op Room

So Monday was not my most favorite day.  It started in the early morning hours…I was rudely yanked out of my bed at 5:30 am and thrown into the car.  No diaper change…no clothes…not even a pair of shoes.

I thought, woohoo, big adventures await.  The possibilities were running through my brain – the beach, the aquarium, the zoo, or maybe even another plane ride to god only knows where.  But no.  We pulled into the hospital parking lot.  Uh oh, this can’t be good news.

After about 20 minutes of playing in the waiting room we were whisked into the pre-op area and lots of people in PJ’s kept coming in and out of our little room.  Some even had really funny looking hats on.  And they gave me a wicked cool nightie that left my backside exposed (finally! My boys get a little air!), and an AWESOME pair of bright yellow socks that gave me big bird feet.  The nurses were actually pretty cool and they took me exploring while we were waiting (waiting for what, I have no idea, but I’m sure it’s probably something pretty awesome!)  We got to check out some really cool equipment that had lots of buttons…a bunch of people lying down on their beds (I bet they’re going to the same slumber party as me!)…and a TON of people wandering around in their PJ’s.

At the end of the hallway we went in to a room where they asked me if I wanted to sit on the bed and take a look at the mask that the big guy was holding.  He said it smelled like bubblegum so I figured, how bad could it be?  I took a humongous breath and…Hmph…what?

Next thing I know someone is calling out my name – and it wasn’t my mom, mind you – and I’m laying on a bed with a tube coming out of my arm.  Aaahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  GET ME OUT OF HERE!  This is the worst slumber party I’ve ever been too.  I am SO not coming back here ever again.  If any of you come near me I’m going to go all ninja on you.  I know karate!  And don’t even think of trying to butter me up with that orange popsicle.  Just leave it on the nightstand and be on your way.  And don’t let the curtain hit you in the arse on the way out!

After what seemed like a lifetime, my mom and dad came around the corner to save me.  It’s about time folks!  A lil’ help here!  Geez.

To be fair though, my mom looked like she was about to hurl her cookies all over the recovery room.  At least I got to sleep through the whole thing.  And now I’ve got a cool scar that I can show off to all the girlies when I’m in high school.

Friday was not just another day in the life of Finnegan Buckley.  Oh no.  It was a day that I’ll always remember.  The day I had my first Icee (or Slushee, as my mom calls it).  It’s almost as good as your first real kiss – not that I would know…YET!

Mom was going a little stir crazy that day…we’d had one too many rainy days around these here parts and she decided that we’d go to Tar-zhay to play.  The playground hadn’t dried out yet, so that wasn’t an option, unfortunately. 

So things started out per u-zhu-al….got a few groceries…worked our way through the toy section…oh wait, we should probably chat about this for a few moments, cuz it was great too. 

Part 1 is the car aisle.  It’s usually crammed with 2 yr old boys pressing every button on every car they can reach, and this day was no different.  It took about 20 minutes to work our way through every car they had…even the scary ones that sounded like they could eat me. 

Then it was off to the ball section.  This is where the skies parted and the sun shone down on me…it’s like God himself was directing me to play in this aisle.  He said “Finnegan my son…ye shall partake of these round objects, they are fun to bounce.”  I told mom this but she didn’t believe me, and after she grew tired of chasing balls around the store we were off to our third aisle….sand toys!  Big giant dump trucks with monster wheels, perfect for driving through the sand.  And if you don’t believe me, check out what these boys at the playground were doing with smaller, wimpy, dump trucks!

I CAN’T WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, so I digress….Icee’s…right!

So after about 90 minutes of that, we go through the checkout aisle, pay for our groceries, and off we go towards the exit door. 
But wait…we’re slowing down by the little food section near the door…I seize upon this opportunity…mom must be having a weak moment….I start pointing wildly at everything I can see and making mad monkey noises.  Both fingers are pointing, in every direction.  At the drinks, at the pretzels..even at the kids standing in line.  Anything.  Something.  Please, oh please oh please.  Somebody do something.

And then a miracle happens.  I hear my mom ordering a kid-sized Icee.  She tells me that I was so good today and that she’s going to get me a special treat.  I just wish my dad was here to document this on film cuz it sounds as if it’s a very special moment and I want this moment saved forever.  For all eternity.  So that I can relive it again and again and again.

So here it is at last.  A Cherry Orange Icee.  I don’t even know how to describe it except to say that it was the most sweet, slightly fizzy, freezing cold, orange-y, slightly cherryish tasting thing I’d ever had.  And mom let me hold the cup by myself and drink out of the straw.  Ok, so maybe I was still sitting in the carriage, but hey, baby steps.  Don’t knock a guy while he’s experiencing frozen goodness in a cup.

Now, if only I hadn’t dropped the dang thing the day would’ve been PERFECT!

I’m starting to think that this might be a weekly thing.  I honestly can’t remember the last time I made it through a full week without seeing some blood.  And unfortunately it’s always my own.

I thought today was going to be awesome.  We went to one of my favorite playgrounds, at Middle Creek Park.  And things were fantastic until…I decided to slide across the playground on my face.  Probably not the brightest idea I’ve ever had.  But sometimes my feet seem to go too fast for my short little legs.

But I got back up, like the trooper that I am, spit out a mouthful of sand, and kept right on going.
And you know what?  When your face is all scratched up, the sandbox bully’s seem to stay away.  Woohoo…more toys for me!

Today started like any other day. Woke up about 6:30, had an english muffin with Dad. Mom came down after her shower and we waved goodbye to Dad about 8:15. About 2 hours later, all hell broke lose.

While Mom was making the bed I decided to explore her closet. Now understand, I’m not a closet novice, I have treked through closetville many times without incident. But, like many others, I lost concentration for just a second.

Wham, down I went like 31 pounds of limp toddler.

I can’t tell you exactly what happened, but it hurt. I’m not sure if my tooth went through my lip, or if I just bit it, but I do know I was losing blood at a rate that hasn’t been seen since Rocky II.

Help Help! Someone Call 911 !

Mom picked me up and told me everything was going to be okay, but I wasn’t buying it.

We called Dad at work and asked him to come home. I think Mom was panicked.

Dad was home in about 20 minutes, by then blood had slowed from a gush to a slow seep. Dad suggested that Mom call the pediatrician and see what they suggested. Some sadist there thought a couple of stitches might be in order.

A few minutes later we were on our way to WakeMed Cary Emergency Room. Dad kept muttering about, “there goes three hours”.

When we got to the ER, we waited in the waiting room for a while with Jerry Springer blaring, and no toys.

Things actually moved along fairly quickly, we were in an exam room in about 30 minutes. That’s when they said something about “stitches” and disappeared. I was hoping that they forgot about us as we watched Tom & Jerry.

Nurse Ratched

No such luck, nurse Ratched and her evil sidekick returned with a cart filled with instruments obviously taken from Saddam Hussein’s  torture chambers.

First they quietly sneaked me onto a baby papoose board. Then they wrap me up with the velcro until I was completely immobilized. As I waited for the water boarding to begin, I felt the male nurse hold my head steady, someone slipped a paper thing over my head with just an opening for my mouth, then, I’m told, a gigantic needle came towards my big, sore, swollen lip.

About 3 seconds after my bloody, cut, painful lip was stuck, and injected twice with a needle the size of a Louisville Slugger, I feel the tug of dissolving thread being pulled through it. In case I haven’t mentioned this yet… OUCH!

After what seemed an eternity, the blood soaked paper thingy was removed and I could see my parents standing there. Yup, just standing there. Not trying to stop the torture, not calling 911, just standing and watching.

I feared they were about to sell me into some Asian slave trade or something, but apparently they had finally snapped out of their funk, and now were all lovey-dovey. They asked the nurse for a Popsicle for me, but I was so traumatized I couldn’t even eat it.

I rode home in a state of semi-conciousness, sucking my thumb, with my green popsicle running down my arm, until I finally gave up and closed my eyes. It had been a tough morning and the only way to deal with it was to take a 3 hour nap.

I don’t know if your mom ever tried to convince you that “playing in the snow” was fun, but mine tried that line on me recently.

Looking out the front door in Georgetown, MA

So, first we leave the 50 degree weather of beautiful central North Carolina and drive all night only to arrive in the snow covered, below freezing, God forsaken area known as Massachusetts. During our 4 or 5 days up there we saw even more snow fall. My Mom convinced Dad that “Finn would love going for a sled ride”. I had no idea what a “sled ride” was, but 30 minutes later, I was face down, boogers flowing down my face with a slightly bloody nose from my slip and fall.

Let me warn any other toddlers out there, DO NOT be swayed by your parents memories of how much they used to love playing outside in the snow. Of course they did, it was the stone age, what else were they going to do all day? Luckily we were soon on our way back to a more sane climate.

Then yesterday, the unthinkable happened. The dreaded snow weather had followed me like a US Marshall after a fugitive. Mom and Dad always brag about how they haven’t had to shovel since they moved to NC in 2003, well those days are over. 6 inches of snow fell over night!

You gotta be kidding me!

Snow started falling around midnight while I was sleeping, and by the time I woke up, there was already a couple of inches on the ground. I looked out the back door in shock and horror at the evil whiteness that had enveloped the yard.

It continued to snow and snow and snow all day!

When I heard my Mom on the phone with Mrs. Lewis next door asking if she had mittens I started to panic. I knew what she was up to. Mittens? That could only mean one thing – cold, wet and possibly a bloody nose again.

Unfortunately, since I can’t form sentences yet, I couldn’t explain my displeasure and the next thing I know, I’m being stuffed into a snowsuit.

I was then dragged outside in the snow to sit on a sled that was cold and wet. I’m still not sure how anyone calls this “fun”

Riding on the sled between Mom’s legs wasn’t bad, especially since Dad was pulling us. Then Mom decided to let me have all of that “fun” alone. Umm, no, that wasn’t going to happen. WHAAAAAA!

We walked back to the house where Dad and I threw snowballs at Mom, hopefully she got the hint

I’m not sure how my mom does this, or if other moms also have this power, but it’s really annoying.

I had totally sneaked under the table and was about to start tearing up the wipes box, when all of a sudden, I hear a voice… the voice of mom. I can’t even see her eyes, but somehow she can see me. Then worst of all, she knows I’m up to something!

Don’t even ask what happens after the camera shuts off.

Hello world! Yup, it’s me, Finnegan Buckley, the cutest baby around. I’ll be posting cool stuff about my life for anyone who cares to follow (that means you Grammy and Grampy).